24 Jul 2015

5 Differences Between One vs. Two Children

I've got a few girlfriends having babies ... again. As in they're expecting baby number two, a few friends expecting baby number one, but mostly friends expecting baby number two. I get asked what has been the big differences between the first and second babies, so I thought I'd put a list together - you know how much I love lists.

1. You're not to keen to be holding something 24/7 again
Unless you're expecting child is very close in age to your first, most likely your first has learnt to walk, well they're definitely not fragile infants anymore. This is something that I forgot, then quickly realise after I came home with baby number two. I forgot what it's like to be holding something all the time. Sure I can't put the baby down, but they're so fragile especially those first few weeks so you, or someone is always holding that newborn. 

2. You stop knowing milestones
With my first baby I was always on Essential Baby or some other parenting site comparing my son's progress with the expected milestones for his age. With my second child I didn't seem to care, as long as they're healthy and thriving, that's all that matters. I even forgot when immunisation shots were due.

3. You stop being a helicopter mum
My first child I was always watching over him. I would stand close by when he's playing, shadowing him where ever he went to play. With my second child I'll walk him over to the gated play area, let him in, go somewhere within view, sit and be alone for a few minutes. I let my second eat what ever he finds on the ground (like I can stop him), and I don't change him into a new outfit unless he's made a big mess of what he's currently wearing.

4. You stop worrying about everything
With my first child I freaked out over the smallest rash, racked my mind why he wouldn't eat a particular food anymore, or hung on to every word a friend said about whatever subject I was seeking some advice about. With the second child you realise half the things you worried about are really unnecessary, but just part of your first time parenting experience.

5. You stop pretending
For me personally, after having my first baby I felt some sort pressure that I've got "it" all together. That everything was going good, baby was breastfeeding, baby was sleeping the prescribed number of hours, baby was hitting milestones etc. I realise now this was just some self inflected pressure on myself. When I had my second child, I realised half the things I worried about were so irrelevant, so I stopped pretending. I started being honest and admitted if my baby doesn't sleep well, I shared when the days of elbow deep in parenting was tough, and as a result I got more support, I felt more empowered and mindful of how I parent.

If you're wondering what to expect with two kids, I did do a post on that a while ago. You can read that post here.

What are some of the differences you've noticed between having one versus two children? 

14 Jul 2015

My New Career

So I've been a little quiet on here lately and there's been a reason why ... I've been working on a project. Ok working on a little idea I've had for a little while. When I say a little while ... like 3 years ago, and finally I've taken the big jump of faith and went for it. 

I've started a service helping other businesses with their social media. This help comes in the form of creating a social media strategy so there's a reason or purpose to what they post online. I also offer managing business' social media presence, and a mentoring service, to help and answer question for those who want to understand, and be champions at running their own social media platforms. 

It's been an idea like I said I've had for a long time. I'm a firm believer that things happen for a reason, and to trust the timing of things. I've realised I wouldn't have been as committed as I am now if I started it back then. The motivation also comes from a better place, where as three years ago it was a reason to not go back to work. Since then I've had exposure and been able to refine my knowledge of this area, and this blog has been a stepping stone and learning block to the services I offer. Like I said things happen for a reason, and to trust the timing of things ... I've really let that belief radiate through this whole process and here I am. Launching my business this week, starting a a new job in a field that I've no formal "qualifications" in besides experience and skills I've mastered. 

This has been a humble idea and has taken a lot to get to where it is today. Of course it's mostly getting over fears, and  finding the confidence to pursue it. It's such a odd feeling when you find that thing that completely interests you, working your arse off doesn't feel like work. I feel like there's not enough time in the day to work on my business. 

I can't wait to build this little dream and see where it takes me. Even taking this first step, I already feel a sense of accomplishment and feel really proud of myself. 

So here are the business details .... 
Please check out my business site: www.followmemedia.com.au
You can also follow my business' Instagram and Twitter accounts on @followmemedia

My encouragement today is to trust in your timing ... it will come. If you've found your passion keep taking those small steps until you're ready to jump off. 

Linking up with Jess

10 Jul 2015

Family Dynamics

It's been awhile since I did a post about my observations of my boys. I really should document about them more, they're growing at such a rapid pace, and I created this space to capture key moments so I have something to refer to once it's all over. However this blog has shifted its focus away from being all about my boys, and more general parenting and children topics. Main reason for this decision is to minimise their presence online, but it's hard not to talk about them since I do share stories about my personal parenting experiences on here.

They boys have been a challenge these past few months. There has been the regular bouts of sicknesses being passed between each other, and the constant feuding, tantrums and screams of sooky-ness. They are playing or interacting together a lot more, hence all the fighting.

Because of this my parenting has also evolved. There's only so much refereeing I can handle before I lose my patience. All preconceived ideas of how I thought I would parent my children at this stage of their development is thrown out the window, and I'm parenting on 'whatever gets the job done' mode. I give in to the chaos and stop fighting a battle that's going to cause me more ... unnecessary ... frustration. This is parenting two boys under four, full time. It gets crazy but to stop yourself from going crazy, you got to let the crazy's think they're running the show.

He's almost four years of age. It's so cliché but time does fly. He's growing up and thrives learning new things. Every since we went to the Philippines he's always asking me to teach him new tagalog words. He's at that stage where he's asking me questions that puts me on the spot, or about things I don't even know the answers to, like "What animals have 6 legs?" or "What do seahorses eat?" 

Eli the past few months has grown to be more reliable, independent, feisty, curious, impatient, talkative and overall boyish. He does what he likes not fearing the consequences anymore as I think he's figured out they're empty threats most of the time. He's picked up a lot of ... boyish behaviours and right now we are constantly repeating rules to him ... hopefully it all sinks in soon. 

We're constantly surprised by his cognitive skills. Wanting to learn another language, his love for numbers, his knack for negotiating (to his advantage of course), and he's got great memory. He remembers things from a long time ago that I thought he wouldn't remember.

Kai is just so adorable in my eyes right now. His mannerism, his long curly locks and round face are part of the reason. Although he always wants to be around me, I still feel like our relationship is one sided because he's not very affectionate. When I ask for a kiss he either ignores my request, or does this lean head forward thing. I think he knows if he treats me mean, he keeps me keen. I remember reading how we interact with our babies they pick up as forms of communication, so I'm always kissing his cheeks hoping he'll understand it translates to something we do to each other, but nope he still plays hard to get. 

He's still not talking. He says a few words if you prompt him too, but they're the basic words all children lean. He is always babbling and singing along to The Giggle Galaxy (yeh! yeh!), Whose in the Wiggle House and Up Town Funk - in his own singing/babbling way. He instead communicates in other ways to get his message across. Like shoving his bottle to us to indicate he wants it refilled, or hands us a new nappy when he wants his current one change (yes he can tell us when he's done a number two). 

We've noticed Kai has little OCD behaviours. Like how he arranges toys and shoes in neat piles at various spots in our home and if someone moves these items he'll return it back to it's spot. Kai loves playing with toys, with a keen interest with ones that have wheels. He loves to roll them across any surface - the bed, the floor, my leg and up my arm. He even does his own little "broooom" muttering sound. 

We also think he might be left handed. I noticed it a few weeks ago but didn't mention anything, but then hubby pointed it out a few days ago.  

My boys. They keep parenting interesting, challenging and rewarding.

Have a good weekend everyone. Enjoy your little people. 

2 Jul 2015

Jake & The Never Land Themed Party

Anne from Domesblissity shares her children's joint party. Both of Anne's children are born in November so instead of planning two separate parties, she asked her children what we their thoughts on a combined party. They both agreed and Jake & The Never Land theme was decided on. There was a girl pirate and a boy pirate, so it was perfect.

Anne made many of the party's elements including the invitation, party loot bags, and the treasure map and chest which she filled with "treasure" for the kids to find.

Various food items were made in theme with the party theme and Anne baked the vanilla flavoured pirate ship cake.

The home's play fort was decorated with skulls and crossbones and transformed into a pirate ship, and her sister dressed as a pirate hosted the games.

You can read more about Jake & The Never Land themed party here.

If you would like to share and submit a past party you've hosted get in contact! Email me on gen.y.mum@gmail.com would love to feature your party on here. 
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