Accidental Electronic Device Detox

Just wanted to share a little win I realised lately. The boys no longer play with the iPad's. Not at home, not when we're out, but definitely at the grandparents. 

It all started about a month ago. Eli dropped an iPad on the ground by accident. He was sitting down and had one on his lap. He stood up to grab some food and it fell a measly three inches. The screen cracked, so did hubby. Eli understood clearly he was in trouble and from the countless "I told you ..." statements he heard from his father and I he knew we were both extremely cross. So from theat moment he hasn't asked for it and because he doesn't play with one, his younger brother doesn't want to play with one either. 

Since they no longer get access to one, they're playing with their room full of toys more. They'll say to me "I'm bored!". Which I respond with, "go find something to do then", and surprisingly they go off and play together more. This also means they're fighting more too.

Going out to eat as parents you rely on the iPad. For us definitely when the boys were younger, when they start to get restless we would pull out an electronic device and put YouTube on. Now they have no choice but to sit there and wait until everyone has finished their meals. I think they're eating more because they're not distracted. I think they're more engaged in their surroundings because they're not looking at a screen. 

I'm not sharing this to show that I'm a better parent, far from it. I guess I'm sharing a progress made with my imperfect parenting. It wasn't like we decided on an electronic device detox, it just happened due to a situation. 

Another interesting outcome from this is I've realised the boys do actually like to play a lot. They're always asking me to join them in some made up game using toys and our imagination, or get outside to play basketball or even just play a game of passing a balloon to each other. 

They're very conscious of when I'm on the phone. They'll tell me to get off or follow me around bugging me until I give in and get off.

They do get access to an iPad when they're at the grandparent's homes. They'll ask for it shortly after they walk in. The other week Kai wanted to sleep over at the grandparent's place, and Kai never wants to sleep over. He was telling me to go home while he was holding the iPad. 

I hope we continue this non-iPad environment for as long as we can. Eli starts school next year so I know we can't keep the electronic devices away forever. But I know we can restrict it if we need to .... and the world will still keep spinning.

Next, getting them to eat more veggies. 

Should I Keep Blogging?

(Asking Eli taking a photo of me. He include his Pikachu stuff toy in the shot)

It's been awhile since I've really blogged. 

It's funny the longer between posts the harder, or the more hesitant you become to publish stuff online. The content I spent some time working on becomes irrelevant, or I start to question whether it's even worth posting. 

Maybe I'll keep this post short and sweet just so I can get over these fears. Just like when someone starts going back to the gym, just rock up, have no expectations except getting your arse there. 

So I'm here. I'm little blogger-unfit, or unwell or insecure? It's been a long time since I've shared something personal.

There are exciting and challenging things I'm currently experiencing, and me maybe 3 years ago I would be sharing those things on here, but now I'm a little hesitant. 

I'm hesitant because the internet is evolving so quick and the online landscape is very different to three years ago. I never really use to worry about my online visibility, but with the increase of identity theft you just don't know who's taking your information and doing what with it.  

I'm hesitant because I'm re-evaluating my why? This blog isn't about making money or lifting my profile so I'm sharing my personal experiences for what? 

I'm hesitant because I run a business.  

I'm hesitant because my children are growing up and I've realised I'm creating an online foot print of them that they might not want me to share. Remember people once you post it online, it's on there forever! Will my boys be happy knowing I've shared their allergy episodes when they were babies online? Can it be used against them one day? 

I guess we all encounter these types of questions when we've been doing something for a long time and lose that spark that started it all for us. Just like going to the gym there comes a point you question it all. Usually, when you hit a plateau you need to re evaluate why you work out, or what your new goals are and change it up. 

Maybe I just need to change it up? 

Bloggers, business owners or even if you work for the man but usually love what you do, what do you do, or how do you keep yourself focused on your hustle or doubts? 

Kai's 3rd Birthday

Last week we celebrated my second son Kai's 3rd birthday. It sure doesn't feel like he's only three. I feel like he's older ... it's hard to explain. Sure the year flew however, it felt like he was stuck at two for ages.

He's still a Mummy's boy. Always wants me by his side. It's annoying at times but I've learned to live with it. I may be his favourite person doesn't mean he's affectionate with me. He hates kisses, he's even told me he likes hugs, not kisses. He's very much an introvert. He doesn't like attention and he hides his face when people notice him. He won't even give family members a hello or high five when he initially sees them. 

He's still learning how to handle situations he can't control. Most of the time he reverts to yelling and sulking when things don't go his way, but now when I tell him, "it's okay you don't have to cry" or "tell me what it is you want" he calms down. We're still trying to help him learn this skill and it's been a tiring and tedious process. When I think about what starts the friction between the boys or the majority of the situations where I lose my temper at them, it's mostly to Kai's reactions to situations. 

He's talking more. I've shared my concerns about his lack of verbal communication but he's speaking so much more in the last 9-10 months. Putting him into daycare has helped. We mentioned to the centre our concerns and his attendance there has helped him come out of his shell and communicate more. 

He's actually adjusted to childcare a lot better than Eli did. We could say goodbye and leave the room without tears after a few weeks of starting. He looks forward to going and we can tell he really enjoys himself when he goes. 

He's cheeky. Have you seen his normal smile? It has cheeky written all over it. He tattle's, he annoys, he teases, he pulls pranks and he fights as good as he gets. 

He's definitely more strong willed and persistent. He will repeat whatever he wants until you give in. He will go at it for ages until the sound of his whining breaks you. I like to think I'm mentally strong, but this boy knows how to undermine me.

He still has a big appetite. He's not the fattest kid but he sure does love to eat. He grazes all day and still has room for his main meals. He's not shy to tell you he's "so so hungry" and he's first to come to the kitchen at the sound of food. Surprisingly he doesn't touch anything he knows he can't have. I don't need to hide eating chocolate or ice cream from him cause he knows he can't have it so he doesn't ask. 

We find ourselves talking and reflecting on Kai most nights. Not because we have major concerns about him, but because he's so interesting. His behaviour, his development, his personality, we can't help but discuss how far he's come these past few months.  

Happy 3rd birthday Kai. You make parenting .... hard. But your character, personality, and mannerisms is what's unique about you. I pray you continue to thrive in your development and grow into the person you're meant to be. We love you so so much. 

Things I Said I Would Never Do As A Parent ... & Did Anyways

They say children change you. It's true. You may not believe it, but you'll eventually realise that you're no longer the same person you were prior to children. I told myself I would be the exception ... I wouldn't let children change me.

Oh, how wrong was I? The "changes" that happens when you become a parent happens to all parents in varying degrees. Here are a few things I know that has changed about me since having children:

That Time I Put My Kid in Danger

We went away the other weekend. We just went to Kiama, about 1.5hrs south of Sydney. We were celebrating hubby and I's seven year wedding anniversary and I was in charge of planning our celebrations, so I decided to go away this year. We took the boys with us cause our regular babysitters (grandparents) all had other plans too. This is one of the annual issues faced when your wedding anniversary is the same or a day apart from your parents and inlaws. 

Belated Happy 2nd Birthday Post

This post should've been published on the day of my son's 2nd birthday, but it wasn't finished and I don't like publishing posts I'm not 100% with.

Our recent holiday didn't give me a lot of free time to be in front of the laptop, (like as if I would rather be anyways) so now that I have finished it, I can now post it.

Happiest 2nd Birthday Kai. My baby boy, King Kai, Kai Kakes, Keks ... I have so many pet names for you. You're so adorable in my eyes that one name (or nick names) isn't enough to identify you. You need more, as you have so many layers, personalities to you.

I'm going to start by saying you've grown so fast. For me it feels like one day you're a baby and the next moment you're two years old. I wish I can slow your growth down, so I can appreciate and enjoy you at this stage of your life more. I feel guilty at times cause I know the kind of attention, care and priority you receive isn't equal.

You're quiet but communicate loudly in your way. You get hurt a lot, but you're hardly ever phased, or you stand up for yourself. You're demanding, always wanting it your way, but you're so sweet, so loving, and loyal.

You're defensive and don't back down from a fight. You love to laugh and make others laugh too. Right now you trains, The Wiggles and are drawn to animals. You're not afraid of them, you'll chase a dirty cockroach if you see one. You're much bigger than your older brother at his stage, so you're wearing (and out growing) so much of his hand me down's already. You pull the funniest faces, like your "beautiful eyes" and "gigil face" - they crack everyone up. You're a baby version of your dad. You look just like him in every way, even the long hair ... this is probably why I just want to squish you whenever I hold you. 

We love you so much Kai, you're so unpredictable and difficult at times, but we wouldn't want you to be any other way. You make our parenting life ... interesting, but you'll always be my baby boy. 

May you continue to thrive, be alway in perfect health, and be watched over. Happy birthday son. 

Linking up with Jess (it's been awhile)

Happy 4th Birthday

It was Eli's 4th birthday last week.

Leading up to his birthday we asked him how he wanted to spend his special day? And of course what he wanted as a present. He wanted an Iron Man costume and he wanted to go to the aquarium. We were surprised by his request to go to the aquarium because last time we went, he was scared of everything. You can see some pictorial evidence here.

On the day of his birthday he put on his new Iron Man costume and off we went to the aquarium. One of his God Parents and his son joined us. Us parents were pleasantly surprised how well the kids took to the aquarium. They were entertained, they were interested, they were curious and wanted to explore and the best part no tantrums.

That evening we celebrate over dinner and cake with the rest of the family. Here are few of my favourite snaps of the day.

Happy birthday my sweet Eli. You're always surprising me with your personality, what you can do, what comes out of your mouth and the stuff you remember. I'm so lucky to be your Mum, and I'm so so proud of you. You're one of my greatest accomplishments in life. I love you so much. You're my inspiration and you give me the courage to do things I didn't think I could do, like function on less than five hours of sleep. I pray God is always watching over you, especially when love one's aren't. May he protect you, continue to keep you in good health and keep any harm away form you. I can't wait to see what you have in store for us this new year of your life, and no you can't have your 6th birthday next week.

Happy birthday my son. I love you. 

Linking up with Jess

5 Differences Between One vs. Two Children

I've got a few girlfriends having babies ... again. As in they're expecting baby number two, a few friends expecting baby number one, but mostly friends expecting baby number two. I get asked what has been the big differences between the first and second babies, so I thought I'd put a list together - you know how much I love lists.

1. You're not to keen to be holding something 24/7 again

Unless you're expecting child is very close in age to your first, most likely your first has learnt to walk, well they're definitely not fragile infants anymore. This is something that I forgot, then quickly realise after I came home with baby number two. I forgot what it's like to be holding something all the time. Sure I can't put the baby down, but they're so fragile especially those first few weeks so you, or someone is always holding that newborn. 

2. You stop knowing milestones

With my first baby I was always on Essential Baby or some other parenting site comparing my son's progress with the expected milestones for his age. With my second child I didn't seem to care, as long as they're healthy and thriving, that's all that matters. I even forgot when immunisation shots were due.

3. You stop being a helicopter mum

My first child I was always watching over him. I would stand close by when he's playing, shadowing him where ever he went to play. With my second child I'll walk him over to the gated play area, let him in, go somewhere within view, sit and be alone for a few minutes. I let my second eat what ever he finds on the ground (like I can stop him), and I don't change him into a new outfit unless he's made a big mess of what he's currently wearing.

4. You stop worrying about everything

With my first child I freaked out over the smallest rash, racked my mind why he wouldn't eat a particular food anymore, or hung on to every word a friend said about whatever subject I was seeking some advice about. With the second child you realise half the things you worried about are really unnecessary, but just part of your first time parenting experience.

5. You stop pretending

For me personally, after having my first baby I felt some sort pressure that I've got "it" all together. That everything was going good, baby was breastfeeding, baby was sleeping the prescribed number of hours, baby was hitting milestones etc. I realise now this was just some self inflected pressure on myself. When I had my second child, I realised half the things I worried about were so irrelevant, so I stopped pretending. I started being honest and admitted if my baby doesn't sleep well, I shared when the days of elbow deep in parenting was tough, and as a result I got more support, I felt more empowered and mindful of how I parent.

If you're wondering what to expect with two kids, I did do a post on that a while ago. You can read that post here.

What are some of the differences you've noticed between having one versus two children? 

Family Dynamics

It's been awhile since I did a post about my observations of my boys. I really should document about them more, they're growing at such a rapid pace, and I created this space to capture key moments so I have something to refer to once it's all over. However this blog has shifted its focus away from being all about my boys, and more general parenting and children topics. Main reason for this decision is to minimise their presence online, but it's hard not to talk about them since I do share stories about my personal parenting experiences on here.

They boys have been a challenge these past few months. There has been the regular bouts of sicknesses being passed between each other, and the constant feuding, tantrums and screams of sooky-ness. They are playing or interacting together a lot more, hence all the fighting.

Because of this my parenting has also evolved. There's only so much refereeing I can handle before I lose my patience. All preconceived ideas of how I thought I would parent my children at this stage of their development is thrown out the window, and I'm parenting on 'whatever gets the job done' mode. I give in to the chaos and stop fighting a battle that's going to cause me more ... unnecessary ... frustration. This is parenting two boys under four, full time. It gets crazy but to stop yourself from going crazy, you got to let the crazy's think they're running the show.

Eli 

He's almost four years of age. It's so cliché but time does fly. He's growing up and thrives learning new things. Every since we went to the Philippines he's always asking me to teach him new tagalog words. He's at that stage where he's asking me questions that puts me on the spot, or about things I don't even know the answers to, like "What animals have 6 legs?" or "What do seahorses eat?" 

Eli the past few months has grown to be more reliable, independent, feisty, curious, impatient, talkative and overall boyish. He does what he likes not fearing the consequences anymore as I think he's figured out they're empty threats most of the time. He's picked up a lot of ... boyish behaviours and right now we are constantly repeating rules to him ... hopefully it all sinks in soon. 

We're constantly surprised by his cognitive skills. Wanting to learn another language, his love for numbers, his knack for negotiating (to his advantage of course), and he's got great memory. He remembers things from a long time ago that I thought he wouldn't remember.

Kai

Kai is just so adorable in my eyes right now. His mannerism, his long curly locks and round face are part of the reason. Although he always wants to be around me, I still feel like our relationship is one sided because he's not very affectionate. When I ask for a kiss he either ignores my request, or does this lean head forward thing. I think he knows if he treats me mean, he keeps me keen. I remember reading how we interact with our babies they pick up as forms of communication, so I'm always kissing his cheeks hoping he'll understand it translates to something we do to each other, but nope he still plays hard to get. 

He's still not talking. He says a few words if you prompt him too, but they're the basic words all children lean. He is always babbling and singing along to The Giggle Galaxy (yeh! yeh!), Whose in the Wiggle House and Up Town Funk - in his own singing/babbling way. He instead communicates in other ways to get his message across. Like shoving his bottle to us to indicate he wants it refilled, or hands us a new nappy when he wants his current one change (yes he can tell us when he's done a number two). 

We've noticed Kai has little OCD behaviours. Like how he arranges toys and shoes in neat piles at various spots in our home and if someone moves these items he'll return it back to it's spot. Kai loves playing with toys, with a keen interest with ones that have wheels. He loves to roll them across any surface - the bed, the floor, my leg and up my arm. He even does his own little "broooom" muttering sound. 

We also think he might be left handed. I noticed it a few weeks ago but didn't mention anything, but then hubby pointed it out a few days ago.  

My boys. They keep parenting interesting, challenging and rewarding.

Have a good weekend everyone. Enjoy your little people. 

Dealing With Hand Foot & Mouth Disease

I've noticed a recent epidemic circulating around Sydney, especially amongst kids in childcare. I'm talking about Hand Foot and Mouth (HFM) Disease. My boys recently had it. 

What is HFM? Its caused by a virus. It appears on the hands and feed, in the mouth and also often in the "nappy" area. It's usually a mild disease that lasts between seven to ten days. It's usually spread by catching from someone who already has the disease or objects that may had contact with the virus.

5 Things to Expect When You're a SAHP

A lot of my personal circles are people close to my age, gen-y's who, growing up were taught the mantra "a woman can have it all." So my circles had children later in life, as a result many made financial commitments prior to starting a family. So when babies did come into the picture, both parents hard to return to work. Returning to work was kinda what ... everyone else did, so I just did that too.

Wiggles Concert

A few weeks ago I took the boys to a Wiggle's concert. Like most kids between the ages of two to five, the boys love them! As soon as they hear the opening song on tv, they stop whatever they're doing and are hypnotised by these five singing and dancing adults, and their group of merry friends.

We watched them locally as they were touring, hosting several concerts in various parts of Sydney, running a few shows a day, so the shows were a little more intimate.

The boys seemed to have enjoyed themselves. As soon they saw Anthony, Simon, Lachy and Emma came onto the stage they were once again frozen. I guess they were so surprised to see their favourite characters live, so it took awhile for them to start participating.

I also enjoyed myself. Those Wiggles know how to entertain a crowd and had a good mix of story telling, crowd participation and a few jokes even a parent found funny. Lots of jokes and innuendo made about Emma and Lachy's now publicly announced relationship.

Who's your child's favourite Wiggle? 

Linking up with Jess

5 Ways I'm Winning at Parenting

There are some days ... ok most days, I wonder how I fair as a parent. Especially as my boys grow, they present me, us with new challenges. They're no longer that small infant who did cute things, they're talking back toddlers who will do the opposite of what you say to get a reaction from you.

Despite all this, there are a few simple tasks that, when completed, gives me confidence I'm doing okay at this parenting thing. 

1. When the boys have their naps

Kai who is currently 17 months, still has two naps a day. Eli is 3.5 years old still has one nap a day. I'm pretty proud of that and makes me feel like I'm winning at being a parent. The naps play a big part in how they are for the rest of the day too. When they don't get their naps expect lots of fighting and sooking .... and the boys get upset too. Kai gets tired and cranky when he hasn't had enough rest for the day, and Eli gets ferrel in the evening if he didn't get his.

2. When the boys finish their meals

When either son finishes their whole plate of food, I feel like I'm winning at parenting. Having kids with allergies, the meal process is already difficult as you have to make sure their meals are safe but also healthy, delicious and nutritious. So when you give them something that meets all those requirements, and they eat it all up, I'm pretty stoked. Cause tomorrow I know they won't want it anymore. 

3. When I have conversations with Eli

My son amazes me with his ability to interact with adults and other children. He's not shy, he speaks up, and he's just so confident. I feel pretty proud when he's able to start and hold a conversation with an adult, I guess we're doing something right. But I really couldn't take credit for it, cause it's all him. Even this morning while I was in the bathroom I heard Eli come into our room and was looking for Ian and says to him, "Why did you disappear from my room?" (Ian fell asleep in bed with him hours prior while he was reading him a book.) I'm surprised to hear a three year old use such descriptive word.

4. The boys adore their extended family members

I use to wonder whether being at home with my kids all the time, I could be shooting myself in the foot, because they might be too dependent on me too much. But I think it has had the opposite affect. When my boys see or spend time with other people they soak it in. They love being around other people who love them. Seeing Eli cry for my parents, or ask for his aunty when she has quietly left during his nap, or miss his aunty and uncle who are overseas, asking me to skype with them, is heart warming. It actually puts my mind at ease that they're so comfortable with loved ones. 

5. When the boys are laughing

As a parent of two boys I spend a lot of time defusing ... minor fights. Mostly over ownership of objects. So when you hear them laughing together, as a pose to one laughing at the other, its beautiful, even if it only lasts for three minutes. 

What every day scenarios makes you feel like you're winning at parenting? 

Linking up with Jess

Life with the 17 Month Old & 3.5 Year Old

It's already February?! ... its pretty much middle of February, which means Valentine's Day. Then Easter is around the corner, then our family holiday, Eli's birthday, another family holiday, Kai's birthday, Ian and I's birthdays, then its Christmas and then 2015 is over.

And of course we fill those key events with other celebrations that we don't factor in the year, like other children's parties, christenings, baby showers and weddings too. Don't get me wrong I love celebrating and I look forward to key milestones and events, it just feels like the year flies, which mean I'm getting older, and so are the boys. 

They're both so ... different again. Different from how they were a few months ago. 

Eli is more defiant than before. When he doesn't get his way he crosses his arms and pulls a big frowny face at us; or points his finger and does a raspberry sound; or yells "No! I don't want to!" I had that out of control, crying, screaming child at the doctor's waiting room the other day. All because I told him to share the toys with the other kids. I felt every eye on me as I controlled the urge to lose it myself cause I was so embarrassed. Its behaviour I didn't expect to be dealing with at three years of age.

It's such a challenging period. It's challenging cause you're trying to balance giving your child freedom to be themselves but also trying to teach them discipline and self control.  

To Eli's credit he's so helpful. I can give him instructions and he'll do it. He wants to help with the laundry, the cooking prep, bringing in the groceries .... and as long as he wants to help I let him. He wants to do things for himself too, like get himself dressed, choose what shoes he wants to wear with his outfit and make his own cereal.

He's definitely growing into his loud but sweet personality. He knows how and what to say to work us all. He'll call various family members and ask to sleep over or ask them to come visit him. He'll say the sweetest "Pleeighs!!" so you'll give him another cookie. He'll say "I'm sorry mum" when he knows he's done something wrong to get out of further trouble. He'll say "Thank you for taking me to ... " whenever it was you took him to. He narrates life and I love hearing it. 

Kai is walking. If you don't already follow me on Facies, (then you should) I posted a few weeks ago he finally started walking. We knew for a while he was getting close. He was standing against surfaces but was too scared to let go. But when we were in Queensland a few weeks back he finally had the confidence to start standing on his own and then taking a few steps.

Kai is still so clingy to me. He still just wants me to hold him, and if I don't he'll scream and cry until I give in. There could be other people in the room willing to hold him instead, but he always wants mummy. Its hard to do anything when he's awake. 

Kai still has a great appetite. He eats so much. He hears the fridge open and he gravitates towards it. He sees you bite or drink something and he'll open his mouth and say "Aaaahhh!!" As in he wants a bite, and he'll eat Eli's share after he's finished his. He loves to feed himself, actually anything he finds he puts straight in his mouth, even bark isn't safe around Kai ... he's such a little piglet. 

The boys are now sharing a room. We've purchased a new bed to accommodate them both and surprisingly the transition has been .. easy. At first Kai couldn't fall asleep as quickly as he could in his cot cause he had so many distractions, plus he's more mobile. We had to stay in the room to calm him down as he would get hysterical when we did leave. But by the third day he figured it out, and we could follow the same routine we had when he was in his cot. Eli has been a good kuya, keeping quiet when Kai has fallen asleep before him. We're no longer hearing Eli unsettled in his room for an hour before he falls asleep, it seems he's falling asleep faster now that Kai is in there with him.

They're playing together more. Kai has always shown an interest in Eli, but now Eli wants to involve Kai ... about 40% of the time. The only problem is Eli wants to play a certain way or wants Kai to do something specific, and of course Kai doesn't understand this yet so he does his own thing. So Eli gets frustrated that Kai isn't following his orders.

They grow up so quickly and they surprise me with their always changing personalities, or even the stuff they do or say. 

Merry Christmas

As we all start to begin our Christmas celebrations, I'd like to send my warmest wishes.

It's so easy to loose sight in the real meaning of Christmas ... why we stop work and celebrate this momentous time of the year. 

This year, now that Eli is a little bit older I've been telling him the story of a special baby who was born on the 25th December thousands of years ago. I've explained to him for us, the significance of this child is the true meaning of Christmas. It's not about what gifts you get or don't get, it's about celebrating the birth of Jesus, spending time with family, being grateful and appreciating what you have been blessed with. I've told him that although he may get lots of gifts, Christmas reminds us of the important to share, give and be kind to one another. 

I know I can't expect him to understand everything, but we can build on it in the years to come. 

Like every year, Christmas Eve will be spent with my family and once 12am hits we open presents. Christmas Day we will attend church for their quick one hour service, then lunch at my brother in law's family home. I can't wait to see my family, enjoy each other's company and eat a lot of food!

What's Christmas tradition do you guys do at Christmas? How do spend this time of the year at your home?

From me, Gen-Y Mum (aka Camielle) wishing you and your family a merry and safe Christmas. God bless. 

Before You Offer Your Child Another Snack

A few weeks ago we noticed a hole or decay on one of Eli's tooth. Concern we took him to our dentist who referred us to a paediatric dentist who specialises in his type of clientele - young children. Upon examination we learn he had developed three holes in three different teeth and that they required filing.

Not one to really give me child lots of candy I question how this could have happened. Firstly, I was asked if my son grazes? (eats small amounts of food throughout the day). Yes he does. Being a kid with allergies and also a fuzzy eater, I'm always offering him food even if he just has a bite of it. I learnt the problem with that is, when we eat we produce acid in our mouth, and when not given enough time between last time and next time we produce this acid, it can be harmful to teeth especially young infant teeth that are still very soft.

I also questioned whether fillings were required on baby teeth knowing that adult teeth will replace them one day. I learnt adult teeth don't start coming through until the ages of 8-12, so until then they need their baby teeth. And if their teeth has holes now it will most likely get worse over time if not addressed, resulting in further decay and may require extraction. If you remove baby teeth way before their intended time to fall off, a cap is required to stop the adult tooth from coming through. Ultimately it'll be an even more delicate and complicated (and expensive) procedure if left untreated now.

So last week he had his teeth filled. Leading up to it we had to book their recommended anaesthetist for the procedure because Eli is so young, he's mostly likely unable to comprehend that he needs to sit still throughout the procedure, so he would need to be put under local anaesthetic to subdue him. On the day of the appointment he wasn't aloud to have any food at least six hours prior, this included not having any milk. Plus 1.5 hours prior he had to stick these medicated pads on the back of both hands which, for a three year old was difficult cause all he wanted to do was remove them.

When we arrived at the dentist we filled in more forms, spoke to the anaesthetist and dentist about what was going to happen that day and waited for our turn. Forty minutes later and constantly telling my hungry child he'll have food soon, we went in. There was five people in the room plus myself. Eli lay down on the chair and we all distracted him while the anaesthetist did his job. During our brief earlier that morning, we agreed to give him gas as well cause one of the sedation medication contained an egg protein and we were not going to give it to him just in case he has an adverse reaction.

I think he had the gas mask over his nose for like a few seconds, then he said complained that it smelt funny, pushed it off and attempted to sit up. He was swaying and began to laugh at himself ... the gas was working. We all told him its okay and I gently helped pushed him back onto the chair. Once he was sitting again one of the nurses ushered me put of the room so they can begin.

About 40 minutes laters I was called back into the room where Eli was awake but drowsy. I gently started to wake him and we went back into the waiting room for observations. He did throw up while we were there, so the anaesthetist gave him a tablet that dissolved in his mouth to keep him from vomiting some more.

Another 20 minutes later they removed the catheter from his hand and we were free to go and within the hour he was back to his normal self. He didn't complain about any pain or problems with eating so I guess the procedure was successful. I had a look at the teeth they filled and it looks as good as new. It doesn't even look like he got fillings done, such an advancement from when I got fillings done several years ago.

We will return back in February for a follow up. The dentist did warn me one particular filling my fall off over time cause its on the outer surface and a prominent tooth we use to chew. I also learnt we should be still brushing our children's teeth until the 8 years of age. There's nothing wrong with letting them learn to brush their own teeth but, we should then go back and do a good scrub on their behalf as they don't tend to clean their teeth thoroughly.

Hope our experience have enlightened you in managing your child's baby teeth. I know I've realised how important their young teeth are, and realising that it's not only sweets that can damage them. 

My 14 Month Old + 3.Something Year Old Boys

It's been awhile since I did one of these. Partly because the past several weeks home life with my boys has been mostly plagued with some form of sickness. We've all been hit with either a virus, or the flu, or conjunctivitis, and we seem to be passing it to each other again and again.

Kids must catch and bring home super bugs, because I've never been this kind of sick ever in my life. I'm not one to get sick often and I can usually solider on when I am, but these last few rounds of sicknesses I've actually been bedridden. During the peak of the illness I was having delusional thoughts like, "This must be how cancer patients feel like ... when you're body is in so much pain, but you can't make it go away." We recover but then we're sick again a few days later. I dunno maybe the contrast in weather conditions plays a part too?

But besides all the sickness, my boys have grown and changed so much these past several weeks. I was looking at Eli just the other night and he looked a little taller than usual so I asked him, "Eli have you grown?" He responded with "Yes, I'm stronger" and lifted his arms to show me his non existent mussels.

His personality has developed even more recently. He's so much more aware of what he's doing that he questions and fights concepts that he disagrees with. Just this morning Ian brought to my attention spat out food he had found hidden under his bag. We believe it was from the day before when Ian told him he couldn't have dessert until he finished the food in his mouth. Refusing to swallow, he must've decided to do something about it and spat it out and attempted to hide the evidence.

We can already see his defiant spirit. Already he argues, gives laser eyes, talks under his breath and tells white lies ... not looking forward to this in his teens. I think Eli and I are very similar and I understand where the attitude is stemming from, so I try and mitigate these types of behaviours before they appear. 

Eli still loves his music. He's still dancing, singing and drumming away to tunes he loves. Right now it's One Direction. One morning to my amazement he danced the routine to Beautiful from Just Dance 4. I was amazed he picked up the moves and routine all on his own and so quickly. 

I was told last week that he'll be moving into the preschool room next year. I feel like its a big deal, it took me half a day to digest the news personally. In this room they start to prep the kids for actual school by having a more structured learning program and removing day naps. This news has triggered the discussion of where he will attend school between Ian and I ................ I'll save that for another post. 

Eli fights for attention. Whatever anyone is doing to Kai, he demands it to be done to him too. If you tickle Kai, he wants to be tickles the same way. If you sing songs with Kai, he wants to get in on the action. If I'm holding Kai, he squeezes in and wants to sit on my lap too. 

His lack of attention at home has resulted in him wanting to spend more time with the grandparents. He's been having more frequent sleep overs - as per his request. He'll tell me he needs to speak to one of the grandparents on the phone, and then asks them to pick him up so he can sleep over, or when we visit and its time to leave he tells us he's not coming cause he's sleeping over. The grandparents are more than happy to have him over of course. 

That means I've had more one on one time with Kai.

And my Kai is one beautiful child. As a mother you can really tell how different your children are, and their differences dictates how you love and interact with them. Kai's spirit is gentle, sweet, observant and resilient ... but he's also tough, fierce and strong.

I love his smile - the "gigil" (filipino word that means trembling and gritting of teeth) face he pulls when he does it. I love how he is even more responsive. He knows the meaning of some words ... well, I assume he does cause he actions them. 

He too loves to dance but slightly different to his kuya's at the same age. Kai either sways his hips side to side, or raises an arm like he's doing a fist pump action to music he must like. 

He wants to crawl at every opportunity. He must gets bored of being held then wriggles as much as possible so that you will want to put him down. However when he's mobile that's when you need to be on your guard the most. Everything Kai finds goes into his mouth. If he can't pick it up with his fingers he will bring his head close and lick it up. I've found him choking on leaves, hard plastic and bark. I've even seen evidence of paper and plastic bags in his mouth too. 

Kai's taste palate has changed slightly. He's over the baby mush and wants what we eat. He prefers food he can chew and hold. It's great though, means I can slowly stop making a separate meal for at least one of my kids. Speaking of food, Eli is now drinking rice milk and he loves it. No more formula for him and onto milk that doesn't require a script ... finally. 

Kai always wants me near and it seems only when we're at home. When we're out I can pass him around to family and friends and he doesn't seem to mind. But at home I step away for too long and he's sooking. Secretly I don't mind though, cause I've realised how much Eli isn't a baby anymore and I'm soaking up these precious baby moments with Kai cause it'll all be over before I know it.

Linking up with Essentially Jess

The Problem With Parents Today

You hear and read this statement all the time, 'parenting 10, 20, 30 years ago is different to how parenting is today'. Raising children evolves as the parenting land scape changes. It needs to to keep up, to assimilate to the rapid changes in society, technology, parenting methods ... everything. 

I had a conversation with an older parent and the topic of parenting sacrificing came about. I sat there, listened and was semi lectured on the differences between how they sacrificed as parents in their day versus how parents of today sacrifice for their children. My parents taught me good manners and not to talk back to elders, so of course I bit my tongue and listening to her make judgements on the parents of today.

Well she doesn't have a blog does she? So I'm going to rant on here the points I would've said to her hadn't I not been so ... polite ...

• You spoke about sacrifices you made to give your children what (you thought) they valued, but really those things weren't that important to them. You were too tunnel vision in what you thought would make them happy. What kids want isn't that hard, all they really want is for their parents to be there. 
• You're such a snob about particular areas and demographics but you were once of them too. You know, working class. It's because of your history and background you're able to have what you have now. 
• Just because I'm not working doesn't mean I'm not making sacrifices. I'm not at home relaxing all day, doing nothing. I had career aspirations, dreams I've had to put on hold. As you would know as a mother, you're the one always making sacrifices for your family. We just value different things, therefore have different definition of what sacrifice is. 
• Parenting 20 years ago you guys shipped family over to help you raise your kids and probably didn't pay them for their assistance. Today we don't want to burden our parents or family with the full responsibility of looking after our children, so we send our kids to expensive childcare centres. A cost that you probably didn't have to factor when you were raising children, on top of other financial commitments. 
• Don't assume all Gen-Y's just spend all their disposable income on material things .... I can assure you I am / my family are an exception. The fact that I am at home is no accident. It has been a financially calculated decision. 
• Lastly I don't understand why you're complaining when the whole purpose of what you did during your parenting days was so your children could live a little bit more comfortably than you did. They are. You achieved what you were working so hard and hoping to see happen one day, so why does it bother you so much?

Argh!! ... I just had to get that out ... 

I could feel my blood boiling during that conversation and I knew even if I did try and explain things to this person they wouldn't see past their own opinions. Cause that's old people for you ...

What comments do you hate hearing about parenting of parents today?

Things Only Parents of Kids With Eczema Understand

I am a parent of two kids with eczema. I have eczema that can flare up too. I've noticed there's a series of routines and behaviours a parent of a child with eczema do. Parents of kids who have eczema can relate to the following:

You know the name of every topical steroid cream on the market.

You know the 7 days on and 5 days off routine.

You suggest days out to the beach not because you like the sun and sand but because the salt water has natural medicating powers on eczema skin.

You secretly hate it when other people point out your kids has eczema.

You hate the summer season cause your child's eczema usually flares up during the heat.

You hate winter cause the season usually dries your child's skin, causing them to itch and irritate their eczema.

You always carry moisturiser with you everywhere.

You get dressed last or at least after you have moisturised the kids to avoid cross contaminating their greasy creams on your clothes.

You get tired of hearing treatment advice from everyone.

You share all your eczema stories and suggestions to anyone who asks you questions on the topic.

You've tried everything to help your child overcome their eczema from creams, ointments, non traditional medicine, salt therapy, changing their diet - there's no bullet treatment that works for everyone.

You buy litre pumps of sorbolene cream and get excited when they're on special. 

You only buy cotton everything - bedsheets, clothing, towels etc.

You know the names of all the recommended eczema specialist / doctors are in your area. 

You only buy products tailored for sensitive skin, including but not limited to dish clothing detergents, soaps, shampoo, conditioner, sun screen ... incase the kids use  these products.

At some point you get grease on your floors, walls, couch, bedsheets, toys, chairs, tv, fridge ... basically any surface in your home your child can touch, because their skin is usually covered in moisturiser and transfer it onto everything.

You don't let your child's skin touch grass often cause it irritates it, even if they're not allergic to grass. And if they have you know they're bathing as soon as they get home. 

You're always telling your child to "Stop scratching!"

Do you have one I missed? What practices or behaviours do you do because of your kids eczema?


Linking up with Essentially Jess

How to Wean My Baby Off Breastfeeding?

Kai's thirteen months old now and I think I'm going to start weaning him off the boob. Why? Cause he really looks for it now, pulling my shirt and does a little tanti when he can't find it himself. I've even tried to cover them to prevent him from getting to it and he gets so mad! 

For awhile I thought he only wanted the boob at night for comfort, but lately he wants it for .... whenever he feels like it, when he's bored, while watching tv ... I think he treats me like a dummy. 

I always thought since I was at home I wouldn't rush this and maybe this time let bub dictate this decision. No, I don't want to be breastfeeding a seven year old and in my head I think "that's not going to happen to us" ... but who knows? 

With Eli I weaned when he was eight months. I'd had gone back to work, and although I had all intentions to continue breastfeeding until he was at least twelve month old, my supply diminished considerably. I don't even remember how I weaned it just happened really. I guess dropping down from regular feeds to pumping twice a day helped the process. Eli was a lot younger, so he was none the wiser. Kai on the other hand, being older, and already declines food he doesn't want, is a little more persistent. And because Kai is wanting the boob on demand lately I've noticed a bit of an increase in supply and fear the weaning this time might not be so ... easy.

I've heard personal stories of painful engorged breasts for days, leakages and advice that once you decide to wean, you got to stay strong and stick to it. It's been likened to quitting smoking ... surely it can't be that bad?

So I'm asking for some advice and tips here. 

How old was your baby when you weaned him or her off the boob? What was your experience? And any tips to make the change as comfortable and pain free for me and Kai